Recently, I have begun taking piano lessons and learning to sing. This may not seem like earth-shattering news to anyone but it is for me.
I am deaf with bilateral cochlear implants. My hearing loss has been progressive. I started out with one hearing aid, then two and when I was thirty one years old I got my first cochlear implant with the second one following eleven months later.
I have always loved music, but yet I struggled in music class. I would watch the kids around me listening, enjoying, and singing along while I struggled just to hear it and try to understand one word.
This week I was thinking back to when my boys were younger. My oldest was at school and my youngest would take a nap early afternoon. It was during that time I would take some time with God. Part of what I did was worship. I remember putting the stereo on as loud as it could go without waking up my son. I would put my ear up to the stereo trying to grasp what was being sung. I broke down and cried. I was angry and I was frustrated. I yelled at God. I asked him why He would put this desire in my heart if I couldn’t do anything about it. Why would He do this to me?
It felt like He was silent but I know His heart hurt for me. I know He was loving me even when it seemed like He wasn’t.
That was probably about fifteen years ago. Three years before I ever got the cochlear implants. In fact my hearing got worse after that. This month it was twelve years since I got my first cochlear implant. It has been a process to learn how to hear. It has taken more work than anything in my life, except marriage and my relationship with God.
Today I can listen to music and enjoy it. I am still learning many new things about sound. This past August I started piano lessons and last month I started learning how to sing. I am actually making progress. It is nothing short of miraculous to me!
This has been a lesson for me in many ways. God knew I would be able to hear music someday. He knew what He was going to do in and through me. [bctt tweet=”God was not trying to hurt or disappoint me, He was preparing me. ” username=””]
This makes me think of Abraham and Sarah when God told them they would have a son. He made a covenant with Abraham. God told him, he would be the father of many nations. They did not have any children and they were very old, beyond childbearing years. It seemed impossible.[bctt tweet=”Has God given you a promise, a vision, or a dream or desire in your heart that seemed impossible? Have you waited for months or years to see this fulfilled? ” username=””]
The enemy likes to plant seeds of doubt and resentment towards God. He likes to try to make us think that God has forgotten us or doesn’t care. He wants us to grow weary in the waiting because then we will give up or quit. ”
God wants us to put our hope and trust in Him!!
“And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:5 (NIV)
When you receive that promise, hold on with hope!
When you see that vision, hold on with hope!
When you have that desire and dream within, hold on with hope!
We can not let the enemy steal from us any longer! I will put my hope in Jesus Christ and no one else! I will move forward in obedience and I will trust His love for me and His promises. I will trust He will give me everything I need for it all. That hope will be the anchor for my soul. He has proven Himself faithful to me and He will Prove Himself faithful to you!
Heavenly Father, I thank You for the gift you have given me. Thank You for Your promises and for Your faithfulness. I pray for those who are waiting on You right now. I pray for those who are discouraged and who feel hopeless. Pour out Your hope and peace in them. I pray You would fill them with Your Holy Spirit and the strength to persevere. Thank You that we can trust You! Thank You that Your love NEVER fails!! In Jesus Name!