“Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to too much wine, teaching what is good, so they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be dishonored.” Titus 2:3-5
My youngest son just turned sixteen and it stirred up a certain reality in my heart. My baby was now moving steadily towards manhood and my husband and I were on course to empty nesting.
In my recent post I had shared that I have been in a season of evaluating my relationships and bringing them before the Lord. When this reality began stirring around in my heart, I thought about those relationships and searched to see which friends had older children or who has had the experience of empty nest.
In Titus two we read about the older woman, the younger woman and the need for both of these friendships in our lives. In this post we will talk about being the younger woman and the need for older women in our lives.
I realized that I had several peer relationships and those near my age. I noticed that I had many younger relationships but I became fully aware that I did not have many older women that I spent quality time with to glean from.
I have struggled with depression over the years in different ways. God has been abundantly good in making me aware of the different things I could do to help keep myself in a place where my mind is fixed on Him and others instead of myself. There are several points and moments in life that can bring out this depression and the temptation to fall into that pit again. One season in life would be empty nest.
I have heard of countless women being severely depressed as they have moved into this stage of life. My heart in prayer has always been to ask God to protect me and guide me through those seasons of life.
I believe the process of evaluating my friendships and shifting where I spend my time right now is an answer to that prayer.
It doesn’t matter what season of life we are in, we need an older woman in our lives. We need a mentor, someone we can look up to in order to learn how God desires us to me wives, moms, and followers of Jesus Christ.
I found that I knew many older women but I wasn’t putting myself in a place to really learn from them. To truly get the most from those relationships, we need to be willing to take time to sit with them and to ask questions. We need to be teachable and allow others to speak into our lives.
I know I need this quality relationship happening in my life, even more so as I learn how to truly prepare for my youngest son moving forward to being a man and seeing both my children into adulthood without being depressed all the way through. I know I need to hear wisdom on letting go and discernment about when to speak into my children’s lives and when not to.
A younger friend is unable to be this type of friend. Someone who has not gone through this season is not going to be able to pour out to me what I need for this moment.
Do you have any older women in your life? Is there someone who you spend time with who can be that example to you?
If you don’t, please pray that God would bring that right person into your life. Ask Him who can be that example to you.
God has given us this “older woman” friendship with purpose. Let’s not miss out on the blessings God has for us in this friendship!