Do We want To Be well?

1 After these things there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem.
2 Now there is in Jerusalem by the sheep gate a pool, which is called in Hebrew Bethesda, having five porticoes. 3 In these lay a multitude of those who were sick, blind, lame, and withered, [waiting for the moving of the waters; 4 for an angel of the Lord went down at certain seasons into the pool and stirred up the water; whoever then first, after the stirring up of the water, stepped in was made well from whatever disease with which he was afflicted.] 5 A man was there who had been ill for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he had already been a long time in that condition, He *said to him, “Do you wish to get well?” 7 The sick man answered Him, “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me.” 8 Jesus *said to him, “Get up, pick up your pallet and walk.” 9 Immediately the man became well, and picked up his pallet and began to walk. John 5:1-9

A few weeks ago, I shared about my struggle in this COVID season.  Without even realizing it, my eating habits changed. We were forced to stay home all the time, so my activity levels changed.  Being in my house continually created an environment for me to be in my head too much. I kept my cochlear implants off more often than I should, which provided more time in my head, which was a breeding ground for depression and overeating.

I tried going back and doing what I was doing before COVID since I was in a healthy place. However, I was not able to get things shifted back in the other direction

My cochlear implant mapping was off, and my brain was constantly exhausted. I lived in a continuous weary state, both mentally and physically, which affected me emotionally and spiritually.

I thought about this. I knew I wanted to be well. Was I willing to do what it took, even if it meant giving up and letting go of things I loved and wanted to keep eating and drinking?

I continued praying for direction and began looking for a 30 day detox and cleanse program. I knew just fasting from a few things for a week was not going to be enough this time. I needed to break the unhealthy habits I had started.

June 1st, I began this process. I eliminated most everything except water, tea, veggies, fruits, and healthy meat, fats, and protein.

This month has been a time of cleaning out my body and getting rid of toxins, but it has also exposed where and what I go to when I am frustrated, uncomfortable, stressed out, and emotional.

It has exposed my heart in new ways and confirmed things I already knew, but didn’t want to deal with, or do anything about them.

As I read this scripture about this man who had been ill for thirty-eight years, several thoughts came to mind.

Seasons had come and gone when the angels had stirred up the water. He was so close to his healing, and he was not able to get in the water. That thought made me sad. I wondered if he had asked anyone for help. Did he do all he could to get into the waters when the angels were there stirring it up?

I love what this passage shows us. Jesus saw Him there and He knew He had been in that condition for a long time. He didn’t just heal him though, He asked the question first. “Do you want to be well.”?

Often, I answer the same way as this man answered. He gave Jesus reasons why He couldn’t get down to the waters instead of just answering the question. Just like with this man, He knows my heart is to be well, but I am going to need to be willing to do what is required, even if it means giving up some things.

Afterward Jesus *found him in the temple and said to him, “Behold, you have become well; do not sin anymore, so that nothing worse happens to you.John 5:14

Jesus came back and found the man again. He affirmed the man’s healing and the truth that He was well again, not just physically but spiritually.

He admonished him to go and sin no more so that nothing worse happened to him. This does not mean that the man’s sin was what made him ill, but we need to continue to make the right choices to stay healthy both physically and spiritually.

Jesus brings healing to our lives, spiritually and physically, and we have a responsibility to keep making choices that keep us in that healed place. That only happens if we truly want to be well.

It doesn’t mean we never mess up or make mistakes, but it does mean when we do, we acknowledge those mistakes, repent, and start walking the right way again.

It has been a long month of detox and cleaning out toxins and bad stuff from my body. The first week was exciting because it was new. By the second week, I was having trouble with missing stuff and craving things. The third week brought some revelation about what I run to instead of Jesus, and this week has been excellent. My brain feels awake and healthy. My sleep has been deep and restful. My body is feeling better except for the sunburn on me, and I don’t feel so weary.

I want to keep feeling healthy and living better because I am healthy. In order to do that, I am going to need to make some choices daily.

Jesus has been healing my heart in some deep ways over the last couple months, He is revealing that He is not main go to when He needs to be. I want to keep my heart healthy and my eyes on Jesus. I am going to have to make some choices daily.

We can do this together!

I would love for you to share any of those areas you may be stuck in so we can pray for one another and encourage each other to make those right choices daily.